You guys, this year for me is all about connecting with like minded individuals. It’s about storytelling. It’s about curiosity and self-discovery. One of my favorite things is meeting new people and leaving the conversation becoming new, and quite possibly life-long friends. This usual happens with me, at least I try to. I love randomly getting a text or me texting someone or even a FaceTime of someone I literally met once (or maybe even never met in person) in my life — it truly makes me so happy.
I spoke at an event in Oklahoma (thanks as always Ellen Trotter you rock) and got to meet many (so many) beautiful, beautiful people, truly on the inside and out. One gal in particular, Lauren, who you are about to get to know in this blog is one of those souls.
I got to chatting with her and just fell in love with her humble and badass spirit. Of course we exchanged numbers and I told her to reach out whenever she needed a friend and I would hold her accountable for her dreams ahead. Randomly I texted her at about 4am her time about a week ago… whoops (sorry so late, or is that early?) just to tell her I was thinking about her and asking her how life was going … how her dreams were going … needless to say I wanted her to get out of a writers block, I wanted to read her work, I want her to succeed. After a few exchanges and an invitation to get out of the funk she wrote this post and we decided we were going to hold each other accountable to our personal writing expectations and goals — find your people and love them hard and hold them accountable harder.
I reaaaally want to create more of an army of livin’ the dreamers. To not just tell my story to people but to hear other stories and to share them with all of you. Stories of love, heartbreak, happiness, dreams and anything and everything people will share … Lauren is the first of many you will love like I do. Meet her, welcome her, love her.
Hi my name is Lauren Tonkovich and I’m an aspiring writer. I say aspiring because right now my life is very still, and by that, I mean I have to make a conscious effort to make the most of my days. I just recently graduated from Southwestern Oklahoma State and interestingly enough people were right. . . College really does hold some of the best days of your life. I lived the student-athlete college experience. AKA a chaotic and constant on-the-go lifestyle. Days were longer than my nights and getting a good night’s sleep was a rare occurrence. Now I can’t seem to stop getting sleep. Trying to find a job has been more than stressful. Its stressful because while a career with a secure income sounds quite comfortable, its not what I want in the long term. No, not even close.
See I want to save lives but not like you’re thinking. You see, when I was younger, I understood heroes as police men, firefighters, nurses, doctors and the list goes on. Which do not misunderstand me, these humans that run towards bullets, into the fires, and revive human beings with their own bare hands are complete and total bad asses. I even wanted to be a doctor at one point and shoot I’m still considering being a nurse or a physical therapist assistant. However, my own personal desire in saving lives comes from. . . are you ready? Relating to one another.
I want so badly for us as individuals to come together and use our own personal struggles, testimonies, hardships or whatever heartache we’ve experienced and use it to help emotionally HEAL one another. BAM. All the freaking feels. Using the words in books to suture emotional wounds. Which is what my book. . . which once I break through this writer’s block and stop making excuses/throwing daily pity parties for myself… will be all about. It’ll be my story… or better yet YOUR story if you will. Which what I mean by that is, I hope that one of the many things I have been through in life will be relatable to your own story. I hope it’ll make you feel like my hand is reaching out through the pages and grabbing ahold of yours. Helping you escape that isolation or break free from the lies you’ve been telling yourself all these years. I hope it’ll spark an urge to share your story and own that shit.
Trust me, I used to be the definition of the girl who hid from her truth because she was embarrassed of what others were saying, or afraid of what they would say. And now? I do not give a damn. Because it is MY story. I lived it, learned from it and am now loving through it.
My desire to save lives comes from refreshing your two most important organs. I plan to reopen your heart to forgiveness and reprogram your brain to see yourself as the warrior you are.
Notice, I did not say survivor. Which yes, you are that too, but that is basically a noun. When people say, “I survived” it almost makes it seem like a part of them died, like they’re sealing that chapter tight.NO, NO and NO. I am about putting into action and continuing to fight the battles life throws at us. And you know who fights battles? FREAKING WARRIORS.
I hope you’ve enjoyed this mumbo jumbo I’ve splurged out. Alexa’s beautiful soul was trying to get the writing wheels in my brain turning again, and oh how clever she is because I’ve been inspired yet again. If there is anything I want to you to take away from this its…being a victim of your situation only gives away your control, but when you own your shit and embrace it…well that makes you a VICTOR my dear.
“all the freaking feels” — this fires me up. For her, for YOU, for the world. My advice to YOU (although I hate unsolicited advice) world is to find people that hold YOU accountable. Find people that inspire YOU. Find people that want YOU to succeed, genuinely and like my girl said be a damn warrior … find YOUR desire to save lives, YOUR desire to do what YOUR heart wants YOU to do, YOUR desire to tell YOUR story.